Empowered and prepared

I created a Facebook post, but haven't used it yet. It's for EMPOWERMENT. The message reads "Gain practical tools, resources and confidence to handle each day with strength."

It made me pause as I went to write this. I was immediately transported to New Years Eve. My person was transferred to a rehab facility for what we thought would only be 4-5 days for surgery. Insurance and holidays messed that up and it turned into a 12 day visit.

There was fear. We knew what to expect in the hospital and I could rest when I wasn't present because I knew my person would be fine. The rehab changed all that. The nurse in charge helped settle us. My person had mobility issues and the doctors and surgeons mandated that all standing and walking was needed to be escorted and using a walker. Easy enough, right? The rehab policy was to not assign any walkers or equipment until evaluation. The tears fell.

Being "Karen" when the term Karen means something completely different is a challenge. I turned into my type of Karen. I wasn't taking no for an answer. We went from a no to a maybe. In the moment, that was a win. The walker was there the next morning. No falls took place.

But EMPOWERMENT is also a challenge. Call any insurance, work or other case worker and unless you have documentation or your person, you get shut down. The rejections of "I can't give you any information" was so defeating.

A friend from a previous job had a loved one fall ill and was unable to communicate on his own. Her story is different and she needed a court ordered guardian for some medical decisions. Could you imagine? Spouses unable to make decisions because you didn't have a paper signed?

One night, I woke up to use the bathroom. We sleep with the TV on. Honestly, at this point, I use it like an alarm clock based on what's on. We loving get "Kelly Clarkson-ed" when our NBC station replays her show and it's so darn entertaining that we inevitably keep ourselves awake. Anyway, a PSA for "Care Out Loud" - a Caregiver's nonprofit organization popped on. What luck! I had been looking for something!

So according to Care Out Loud, these are the 5 documents you want to have ahead of time (Hint-Hint - start collecting these before you need them to EMPOWER you when you do need it).

• Medical Power of Attorney & Advance Directive

• Financial Power of Attorney

• Deeds and Property Records

• Will

• Insurance Information

In our situation, my person was still able to make decisions and speak up, but had it been worse, I don't know that I would have been prepared.

Care Out Loud has also noted that 1 in 4 people will become a caretaker. That number sticks with me and you'll see it repeat itself in my blogs. It can be for parents, spouses, children or another loved one. And so many times, you're making decisions uninformed. You don't know what you don't know.... so EMPOWER yourself. Have the hard conversations.

In those worst days you will inevitably face, don't add "go to court" one of those to-do list items. Having these in a secure place with trusted loved ones informed of the location will help. Again 1 in 4. Look around at your next get-together with friends and start counting. I'd even bet one of those sitting across from you will already have caretaker experience.